The Cycle of Lies of Learning

How many times have you heard someone say, “I’m terrible at Math. My parents were awful too, so I guess that’s where I get it from” or “I don’t know how to write. It’s always been a problem for me.” Or the dreaded test anxiety!! These are just a few examples of the cycle of lies that we perpetuate on ourselves. 

What if there is a different possibility? What if you don’t have to be terrible at math or have difficulty with writing just because someone in your family did or you had difficulty in the past? What if you don’t have to panic when you have to take a test or perform in some way? 

When you are willing to see that there might be something different available, you open the doors to change. With a decision or conclusion statement as above, you shut the doors to anything different being available. It’s as if there is a huge concrete wall around you that keeps out growth or change. And so the cycle of lies keeps going round and round. 

Now, if you are someone that would like it to be different, then I have some tools to share with you to get the ball rolling. First, wipe away all the conclusions you have about learning or your capabilities. Take a vacuum cleaner to all those points of view and suck all the dirt of lies into the container. Do you feel a little different already? Do you see that there may be something else possible?

Next, ask a question and don’t look for an answer. I know, I know! You have been taught that when you ask a question you should have an answer to the question. This time will be different. We are going to ask a question to allow a new awareness. Up to now your answers have been all about not being good at something. The questions I will give you are designed to go beyond the answers to give you an awareness of what could be possible outside of the concrete walls.  

Open-ended questions with no answer attached can give you a new awareness of something different. Sometimes things just change because you have asked the question and you have allowed the concrete walls to begin to dissipate. Other times you may have an “aha” moment when it becomes very clear as to what you could do that would make a difference. 

Here are some examples: 

What would it take for me to have ease with math, numbers, finances, and money? 

What is possible with writing that I have never considered? 

What would it take for me to have fun and ease with reading?

How many of you have either taken on your parents points of view about learning a particular topic or subject? How many of you have passed on those points of view to your own children? How many of you continue to judge what you have decided you lack? 

This often occurs in conversation and even more often it occurs without words. Let me explain… We are perceptive beings. We sense so much beyond words. Did you ever know someone was mad even if they didn’t tell you they were mad? Did you ever sense that what someone was saying wasn’t true? That is because you are perceptive and can sense energy beyond words. Many of the places we limit ourselves in our lives come from an awareness of something non-verbal. It could have been a parents belief about their own difficulty in a certain area of school or a teacher’s judgment of your ability or even sensing another student’s difficulty.  

What if many of your beliefs, thoughts, feelings, and emotions are not even yours? What if many of them you pick up from others believing they are yours? Approximately 98% of the thoughts, feelings, and emotions we have don’t even belong to us. That is how highly perceptive we are. We are like an antenna picking up the energies of others without even realizing.  

A very powerful question you can ask for all of your thoughts, feelings, and emotions is, who does this belong to? Thoughts and ideas that don’t belong to you give you a feeling of heaviness. When you ask the question, who does this belong to, and the heaviness starts to dissipate then it’s not yours at all. Let it continue to lighten up and float away. You might realize who you got that belief from and you might not. It doesn’t matter. Just let it go.  

Imagine you in the center of a huge circle, surrounded by other students, teachers, and staff members and your parents and other family members. Imagine lines of energy going from you to every other person in the circle, and lines of energy going from each person to every other person in the group. That’s how we are connected and that’s how the energy of thoughts get passed around. With these thoughts and beliefs we keep the cycle of lies of learning in place, often unknowingly.

Is it time to break the cycle? Is it time to have a different possibility? Does that excite you?

Then I invite you to play with the tools I have mentioned. Play with them with no need for a result and see what shows up. What if learning can be ease and fun? What if there is so much more possible for you, your child, or your students?

Summary:

Tool #1

Let go of your decisions and conclusions about learning and your capacities. Those are stories we keep telling ourselves that are not true and limit what can be. 

Tool #2

Ask a question such as, what would it take for this to change? A question empowers and an answer stops all other possibilities. 

Tool #3

Ask, who does this belong to when you have thoughts about what you have decided you can’t do or be good at. If the heaviness of the thought lightens up it’s not yours. Let it go! Remember, 98% of your thoughts, feelings, and emotions don’t even belong to you. Even if you have had them for years. 

For more information about differences of learning:   

Would you Teach A Fish to Climb A Tree

Photo by Tim Mossholder on Unsplash